That’s right, our new program is going to be airing Thursday, February 12, and you’re all invited to see us in action.
In the series, I play a hard-hitting yet soft-spoken former alpaca breeder-turned-private detective, who goes deep undercover to foil a ring of villainous optometrists bent on world domination. Their dastardly plan is to give people the wrong eyeglass prescriptions, thus blurring their vision and paving the way for the nefarious oculists to seize power while the rest of the world looks indistinctly on.
My wife, of course, plays a mysterious Asian femme fatale, pressed unwillingly into the services of this opprobrious optical organization through a convoluted and highly improbable series of events which involves a lot of expository dialogue in dimly-lit restaurants.
Our boys are cast as Dickensian street urchins, street-smart and rough-edged but with hearts of gold, who provide snappy one-liners and light comic relief. Their tragic past slowly unfolds through awkward interior monologue and a series of bewildering flashbacks. Reviewers constantly refer to them as “those adorable half-Asian tots.”
Tune in to see explosions! betrayals! men in lab coats! careening car chases and hilarious hijinks!!!
Okay, so I may have stretched the truth there just a skosh. Truth is, we’ll be appearing on HGTV’s ‘House Hunters International’. The episode airs this Thursday night at 10:30 EST in the US, and, to the best of my knowledge, it will contain neither evil optometrists nor explosions.
No doubt I will be writing about our experiences filming the show – after I check with the HHI lawyers to see if that will result in me being on the receiving end of a lawsuit. To be honest, the filming was an interesting and generally entertaining experience, so I can’t see the legal department having much issue with me writing about it.
Anyway, hope you can make time to check out the show, and afterwards please let me know what you thought. You’ll have to contact me through my agent Sharon, as I’m going to be busy with a project I’m working on with Brad, George and Leo, but you can be sure that my publicist will respond to any comments you care to leave.